Time flies...

Well it's been forever since I last blogged, and again so much has happened since.

Claire (Mark's twin) had a beautiful baby boy 12weeks earlier than planned.  Was all a bit scary as Claire's life was on the line as well as her unborn son.  Thankfully though they both made it through and baby Michael Keno Ogueno Lingard Omorome (phew, it's a mouthful) shall be home sometime very soon!  He's gone up to 5lb 8oz since he was born at 2lb 4oz on the 18th June.  

Mark's set up his own business "PC n Me" and it's going very well considering he hasn't started advertising yet!  I find the name awesome 'cause my initials are PC (well for the next 7 and a bit months at least) so I like to pretend the business means me and him, but seen as I do not have a clue about computers I really don't think that is the case at all!

That's about all the good news I have to be honest, the rest is pretty bleak.  It seems everyone around me is ill, myself included.  I just found out over the weekend that a childhood friend of mine may be facing brain cancer.  He's only 22!  When my parents were together we lived in a six in a block close at the other side of Linwood and were blessed with fab neighbours.  Upstairs was Karen and Gillian who were a few years older than me, then there was me and Gillian and below us a boy called Gary and opposite Calum and Danielle.  Calum is the boy who is sick (please remember him in your prayers).  Calum was like my best friend when we were living there, we played power rangers all the time.  Usually it meant climbing on the bins and onto the bin shed, fighting over who got to be the red ranger (I was a bit of a tomboy).  In the end Calum would insist I should be the pink ranger, and had I known at the time what "sexist" meant I would have made sure he did too!  One day we got in a fight and the only way to settle the red ranger arguement was to do a flip off the bin shed.. whoever did the best would win (I don't know how it was going to work because there were only two of us there, and frankly we were going to pick ourselves anyway).  Calum went first and landed on his bum, convinced I was going to do so much better I threw my full weight into it, fell on my arm and shattered my elbow.  I wasn't allowed to play power rangers for a long while after that!  Our parents were close too! The first holiday abroad I went on was with mum, dad, Gillian, Calum, Tam and Jane (Calum's parents).  He will get his results on Wednesday, and I can't explain how much I want them to be clear.  He's so young, he has his whole life ahead of him, or at least he should do!

I've not been doing so well either lately.  Most of you are aware I was doing the billings ovulation method with my GP.  Basically you just chart down every aspect of your cycle and from that your doctor can tell if your ovulating or not.  I'm not.  To make it official he ordered some blood tests and the results were a big bit dodgy.  My estrogen levels are so low its pathetic and my prolactin levels are through the roof.  From the high levels in the blood, the fact that my eye prescription has changed so much coupled with the severe migraines I've started suffering with over the past few months (one of which landed me in hospital) he thinks I have a prolactinoma.  A prolactinoma is basically a growth on the pituitary gland, it sits right under the optic nerve and that would explain the headaches and vision probs along with the blood test results.  I'll know more once I get my MRI results, but if I want a family next year it's going to be surgery to correct it I think.  

All this bad news has sort of put me in a downer and it was made worse the other day when I saw my friends dad.  My friend Natalie died two years ago under suspicious circumstances of which I won't go into, and I met her dad in Asda.  Apart from Natalie's funeral I hadn't seen him since I was about 11.  Natalie and I took it in turns to stay over with each other at the weekend, we were from the same background, we both lived alone with our dads.  I remember once being there after school on a Friday and countdown being on, we were trying to get the conundrum but we couldn't work it out.  All of a sudden her dad, Mr Roberston came out with "canoodling" and although it was the correct answer, Natalie and I were in hysterics for a good half hour, just the thought of her dad saying that word, we thought it was a "dirty word".  We used to always hide from Joseph too, he had a thing for Natalie, always coming in for her and stuff and her dad chased him every time.  We used to pretend we'd meet him, just to shut him up, then tell her dad to tell him we were out when he knocked on to see why we hadn't turned up.  Anyway I wanted to say hi to Mr Robertson, I really did, but I couldn't.  I didn't know what to say, didn't know if he would remember me, didn't know if he wanted to remember all that had happened, so I turned and walked the other way.  Now, I wish I had said hi.

It's sick how life turns out, all the young ones are leaving before the parents.  My friend Gillian battled cervical cancer, though thankfully she is still with us now.  Young Calum, Natalie and my fellow dork from high school, Hugh hung himself when we were 18.  Life is fragile, and any normal person would realise that and cherish every single minute, not me... I just feel confused, scared to get close to anyone in case they are next to leave me.  Even poor Mark is being pushed aside at the moment because I love him more than life itself and I couldn't handle losing that, but that would not be my call to make.  Perhaps in a couple days when things have calmed down my head will too, but for now.. I'm terrified!